Cats > Careers

By | Really? | No Comments

(Yes, my cat is a loyal subscriber.) One of the best parts about my job is the variance between yesterdays and todays. For instance, yesterday1 I prepared a package to send to a prospective client. Today1, I brainstormed an idea for an ad we’re placing in an upcoming event program. Now, to validate the claim my title suggests… On Monday, I emailed our business development team requesting a bio and headshot from each of them for our new website. As of this afternoon, I had received one response from the seventeen individual requests sent. 1/17 = 5.8% (after four days) This afternoon, I sent an email to a few of the same individuals, requesting a picture and brief narrative about their adopted feline friend(s). Within twenty-six minutes, I had three stories, fourteen cat-pics and something to blog about. 3/4 = 75% (within thirty minutes) [1] Among many, many other things.

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Sneezing Command

By | Humor | No Comments

The tone of your voice usually dictates your attitude; however, it can be the result of something else. Cold water, a pinch/poke/punch, sudden loss of air to the lungs, these are all things capable of adjusting your speech. This morning, I accidentally combined a sneeze with a request, thus turning a kind gesture into a yelled command. Shortly after, laughter ensued. A coworker and I were gathering samples from one of our conference rooms. I felt a sneeze coming on and tried to warn her to keep her distance, (so I didn’t shower her with sneezy particles). The sneeze hit early and I yelled/sneezed, “Stay back!” I made an un-PC comment about having Tourette’s syndrome and we continued working. A few minutes later, she stopped laughing at me. Welcome to a day at my office.

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Whistle While You Work

By | Humor, Peeks | No Comments

But, please, keep it to yourself. I’m not a white cartooned female and you don’t have an adjective for a name, stand fewer than four feet tall, or carry a pick axe. It’s bad office etiquette to implant (through whistling) late 80s songs into someone’s head without expressed written or verbal consent. Earlier today, a co-worker came into my office and began whistling…um, nuh uh. If there’s an ‘a’ before the ‘m’ then the only thing your lips should be blowing is the steaming cup of coffee in your hands. I pepped up the pipes and belted out a louder whistle. My tune, (a Coldplay song), acted as contraception for the incredibly catchy track from something very Monster Ballad-y. Not gonna get in my head. I win. Go blow air in another someone’s office.

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Chopped Chit Chat

By | FYI | No Comments

If your WPM is fewer than, or equal to, your grandfather’s age on your fifth birthday, then please take typing lessons. I’m not referring to shorthand or txt lessons…no, I’m talking about cue, double you, e, are, tea, why (skills). Especially if you plan to use your keyboard to communicate via IM. Also, when IM’ing, prudently utilize the backwards L-shaped key – certainly if depressing that key results in a send. Receiving news in bits doesn’t bother me. Receiving news in broken bits is what really angers me. Respect the amount of time your recipient wastes watching the “Ross Clurman is currently typing” notification only to realize that you were just finishing your thought. And, under no circumstances should you follow the scattered sentence with a visit to their office, or a phone call for verbal translation.

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